Sunday, October 28, 2012

soooo long, october.

{nashville food day at the farmer's market on wednesday night - the epitome of everything i love about what i do.  also, probably one of the only places you'll ever hear the response "well done" to "my earrings are from nashville - local, too!"}

{halloween shenanigans on homecoming weekend}

i'm a stickler for organization.  i used to say during interviews that my biggest weakness was "definitely my type A personality...." until i learned that employers want to believe that you have the resilience of george clooney in a well-tailored suit.  they want to believe that you are flawless.  also, describing yourself as "type A" doesn't exactly make people want to hang out with you.  never have i ever thought, "god, i LOVE people who wake up on the wrong side of the bed every morning, and have an undying need for order and regularity!"

but lately, my planner looks as if a 2nd grader with astigmatism who has yet to receive glasses got ahold of it during art class. the other day, i scheduled 3 different meetings at the same time.  for the meeting after that, i told 3 different people to meet in 3 different places.  when my parents were here for parent's weekend, my dad suggested that i upgrade to an iphone because i have, and i quote, "fallen behind the times." WHERE IS MY BRAIN.

despite the fact that these upsets may be due to a lack of constant iphone updates that the rest of the human population is used to, i've started to acknowledge the fact that i'm just too dang over-scheduled. whenever i feel at my "busiest," i make sure to revisit this article from the nytimes.  every time i read it, it reminds me that i just need to slow things down.  our perceived "busyness" serves as an "existential reassurance, a hedge against emptiness."  although most of us hate being busy, our busyness may make us feel temporarily important and in demand.  and while this may not be true for everyone, this concept definitely rings true for me.

that being said, i'm practicing this new thing called "saying no,"where i'm actively trying to make time for myself, for those i love, and for an overall more peaceful state of mind.  as weird as this sounds, it's kind of an empowering feeling when you become aware of your own limitations.  you don't often see the words "empowering" and "limitations" in the same sentence, but i know we'd all be better off if we started to realize just how much, or how little, we could handle.

"figure out who you are, then do it on purpose."
- dolly parton

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